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Brad: "You are Right, You are Right, You are Right "

"You are Right" are Brad's 3 favorite words but unfortunately he does not hear them as often as he would like (I definitely say them more than I care to admit.) In fact, he wishes to hear those words more that when I call him my ring tone is me saying, " You are right, you are right , you are right ...."

So if you don't know what to get the special person in their life - a personalized ringtone is the gift that never stops giving and is sure to bring a big smile to his/her life every time you call.

I never would have thought a present that costs so little monetarily (but costs a lot of my dignity) would bring so much joy to Brad's life. In fact it is truly the little things that make our marriage work. I am thinking about this quite a lot lately because Lane and Sarah are about to say their "I do's" very soon. And even though I am sure they do not want any marriage advice before their big day, if I do not give directly but through a blog then it's truly not "advice." It is a blog "worth reading."

Early in our marriage, I used to be very competitive with Brad in every game (backgammon, gin rummy, etc. ). I loved to be the winner (maybe I gloated a bit) but then I read an article about relationships that stated if you are always trying to be the winner then the other person is going to be the loser. And do you (I) want to be married to a loser. Never. This made we really think (yes ,I do that occasionally). So I bean to gloat less and not be so competitive. Just enjoy the game. Not that I still don't like to win but it is not always so important to be the "winner" all the time. This was truly a lesson for me.

Before I got married I believed in all those sayings such as "Being in Love means never having to say your sorry" (remember the Ziggy cartoon)? I now know that the opposite to be true. When you are in love saying "I am sorry" is really important. It doesn't necessarily mean you are wrong but it does mean you feel horrible that the "discussion" turned out badly and would never want to hurt me (let's pretend Brad is saying he is sorry). And when you say you are sorry it usually means the "discussion" will get over faster, which is a win-win for all and Brad will usually get to watch ESPN sooner.

Another saying that Brad lives by is "Alway Kiss Goodnight". This is a top 10 marriage action for him. This is not as important to me as Brad. I have no problem going to bed with out a kiss but since Brad says he is sorry much more than me I throw him a bone with this one.

He even bought a poster to remind me.

I don't want to sound too preachy but since Brad and I are empty nesters we have relearned that it is truly the little things that we do for each other that matter the most. And Brad has promised me that if I kiss him goodnight I will sleep well and there might be jewelry under my pillow when I wake (still waiting).

Happy Empty Nesting!

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